Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
