every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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