Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
