We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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