i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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