I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Is this like a preordered booty call?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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