btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Randomize
