what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
What a dumb baby whore.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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