he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
third nipple confirmed
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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