If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
