my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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