I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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