how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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