i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
