omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I just blew my weed a kiss
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
You've changed since you got that strap on
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
