Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
P.S. I can't hear my feet
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
