sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
