after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
