we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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