i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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