i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
