can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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