I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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