i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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