Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
