i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
You don't make any sense
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