Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
