at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
