absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
