her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
