I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
