Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize