used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
