you guys were way drunker than both of me
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
