I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
