I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Alive.
So much puke
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
