I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Randomize
