We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
