Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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