we're blogging at a bar
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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