It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I love having hate sex.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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