I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
