At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
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