Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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