We won't sleep together?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize