Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
