yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You're like the curious george of whores
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize
