tonight lets celebrate not being married
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
