my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
