Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Randomize
