She said her name was "party"
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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